Homeward bound

Through reasons best kept to myself I've arrived at Incheon airport more than 4 hrs before my flight. The check in desks don't even open for another hour, I'm that early. It would appear that I'm not the only one though judging by the QUEUE that's forming at the check in desks. Don't people have anything better to do than standing up for an hour?? Like sitting down and charging your electrical companions whilst writing about the fools in the queue. 

Maybe they know something I don't. Maybe there are just rewards for early birds beyond the security gates. This is after all the airport that's been voted the best in the world for 10 years running. Not my words but spelt out on a massive screen in the departure hall. As far as I'm aware there's a Korea museum on offer, as well as a spa/sauna open to all, normally the reserve for those flying fancy classes. Without a doubt there'll be countless shops and cafés too. We're on Korean soil, goes with the territory. Maybe that's enough to entice the keen traveller to ensure they check in first. 

My Korean adventure is drawing to a close, all that remains is the customary trawl round the duty free shops, 'test' a scent I've no intention to buy (Bleu de Chanel) and munch on one last bowl of kimchi. Might spray the scent even more liberally than normal seeing as I won't be having a shower for a good while, and I've already walked round downtown Seoul for a day. Had to resort to desperate measures just before, foot hygiene by face wipes. It's never a good thing when you can smell your feet when stood up.

Having now joined the queue so to not miss out on all the fun of the fair, I've ended up behind a Korean party of 5 with an obscene amount of luggage, plus a dog. I'm guessing at least one of them is setting up home elsewhere. Or they've just gone berserk in the shops. Could be both. There's a curious phenomenon in Seoul, presumably throughout the country - the duty free department store. If I've understood it right it's essentially an airport duty free shop but in the middle of Seoul, accessible to browse for all and sundry, but only those who are about to leave the country imminently are allowed to buy stuff. You then pick up the purchases at the airport. For all intents and purposes it's a brilliant idea, you wonder why other countries haven't followed suit. Some may have, I've only been to a small percentage of countries, but I've never come across it elsewhere. There's the facility to claim a tax refund for certain goods but that's different. 

I paid a visit to one of said duty free shops the other day, there's a few of them as you'd expect, and it was an experience that will linger for years. They ought to make it mandatory for everyone visiting Seoul. It is so worth it, it says as much about Korean life as any recognised cultural attraction. Spread out over 2 floors of the megalopolis that is the Lotte department store in Myengdong, the general vibe can best be described as total bedlam. People were rushing round like headless chickens and the noise levels must've been at the upper ends of what's permitted under health and safety. Think Primark at Christmas. Only in a luxury, Selfridges-esque setting. Getting the duty knocked off may sound like a worthwhile endeavour but then the VAT is only 10% here. I love a bargain but I've never felt that overjoyed at getting a 10% discount. Perhaps I'd be thinking differently if Prada, Dior, Louis Vuitton et al were real to me. When you fork out 3 grand on a pair of Chanel boots it probably pays off enduring a mayhem shopping experience in exchange for a tenth off. In sharp contrast, I bought some chinos and a Pet Shop Boys t shirt (photos to follow) from a Uniqlo type shop earlier today and was given a receipt to claim the VAT back. All £1.80 of it. A far, far cry from the Chanel echelons. Needless to say I let the Korean government keep the tax, hopefully they'll do something useful with it. 

The Lotte department store is housed in three interconnected high rises, the main department store, an annex for youths and a separate 'premium brands' building. I accidentally wandered in to the luxury one and didn't realise until I was in the lift and glanced at the floor plan. All the usual suspects had their concessions across the first 9 floors, Jimmy Choo was still in development, a bit late to the party there. On the 10th floor however was a dentist, random, and a plastic surgeon, randomer. What's that about?? Imagine nipping off to Harrods for a pair of Manolo Blahnik's and a spot of botox, or Fortnum and Mason for a morning coat and an eye lift?

Perhaps it isn't such a random concept after all, back on ground level where us peasants roam, the sheer number of health and beauty shops would suggest that Koreans are either obsessed with beauty or keen to maintain sound mind and body. Second only to cafés in number of outlets, there was even a branch of one chain, Olive Young, by the foot of the Namsan Tower, sandwiched between the souvenir shop and an ice cream parlour. This to me is a slight paradox. Looking at the population in general they don't appear to have any skin issues nor do they seem to wear that much make up. In fact the Korean gene appears to be very favourable for healthy, radiant and blemish free skin. Shame that good gene passed me by, 37 and still counting spots here. I ought to have enquired within in hindsight. There's probably a universal language for oily and blackheads.

**The airport experience was particularly disappointing. Most shops and facilities shut at 10pm so it was slightly eerie walking through a deserted airport. They should really reconsider their opening hours if they want to keep their position as head of the class. Dubai and Hamad is on it 24 hrs a day. I'm now typing from the plane. I've joined the mile high blogging club! Definitely not tother one. That would just be wrong**

The holiday has been amazing for many reasons, a nuisance for others, so on balance I'm equally pleased with the trip itself and the fact I'm currently homeward bound. It dawned on me this morning that I've been virtually silent for 12 days straight, apart from the odd hello, thank you and "English". Quite an unusual concept for me, I'm generally rather chatty/jovial/opinionated/argumentative, my vocal chords must be in a state of confused flux. Back to normality tomorrow, the Liv Ullman routine is ultimately not for me. 

There are lots of things I'll miss about the place - the general vibe, the food, the weather, the complete absence of potentially threatening or intimidating situations, the culture, the food, the cleanliness, the food, the range of age groups you come across at any time - in the street, in shops, at attractions. OAPs are out in force living life to the full, including mastering the MANY stairs up and down in the subway. No wonder they're all slim!

To put things in context, all the subway stations are some degree of massive. They're on at least 4 levels, often 5 or 6 depending on how many lines intersect. It's a relatively new subway and by god they really dug down into the ground. There are plenty of escalators around but not many stations have elevators and every single station has unaided steps, some more than others. From getting off the train to reaching street level can take about 10 minutes, even at quieter times. With the hoards of people too, I certainly felt bamboozled at times, getting on the wrong train, missing my stop, walking in the wrong direction and so on. The underground shopping arcades on the first level down from street level don't help either. They've got some bits completely right though, it's really really cheap - 60p will get you way out in to the suburbs, all platforms have got a security wall akin to the one on the Jubilee line so no opportunity for suicide jumpers, the trains are spacious, wide and high ceilings, and really well air conditioned. Most importantly mobile networks are fully covered and there's free wifi on the trains. 

Technology is everywhere, as you'd imagine from a country that gave birth to Samsung, LG, Daewoo etc. One public toilet I frequented had a digital panel with buttons for flushing, cleaning, lighting and other things I didn't understand. There are TV screens wherever you turn, either giving instructions or playing adverts. People young and old are on their mobile phones ALL THE TIME. I thought I was quite bad but I'm a novice in comparison. Even when people are sat together conversing tête-à-tête, there's usually one or two mobiles in active use. I don't think I observed a single gathering that was mobile-less. It's probably already happening amongst the youth of most countries but I love the fact that older generations were just as trigger happy with their mobiles. Snapchat's addictive innit.

Technology was evident at the cinema too, Korea having pioneered the 4D technology which has recently arrived in the UK. In Milton Keynes of all places. The fourth dimension is all physical - the chairs tilt and vibrate, there are wind machines and water sprays, weird air gusts coming from the head rest, light effects and really unwelcome 'punches' in the back from the seat. I of course had to try it so went along to the only film currently showing in 4D, the new Avengers movie. Not my genre of preference but the special effects were great. The 4D features were interesting but a bit distracting, particularly the vibrating and punching chairs. Funnily enough some of the film takes place in Seoul, with a big action set piece playing out in city centre. It was quite surreal seeing the exact street on the big screen that you'd walked down a couple of hours earlier. 

Of course not everything was rosy. The language barrier really made it quite a tricky place to be in at times. At the main attractions it was fine, as was the foreign enclave of Itaewon although I spent minimal time there. Getting back from my North Korea viewing day trip was an altogether different proposition, as was picking restaurants where all signs were in Korean only. People would unsurprisingly speak Korean to me as well and quite quickly the blank expression routine started to feel embarrassing. Initially I replied with "yeong-eo", Korean for English, but I can't have pronounced it properly because it drew a replica blank expression back so resorted to "English" which at least had the desired impact. 

Another rather irritating feature was the beer and "anju" tradition. Koreans tend to order a plate of really expensive sharing food, "anju", when they drink beer, most often fried chicken, dried fish, fruit or chips, so much so that a lot of bars require you to order food in order to serve you a beer. I got up and left on a couple of occasions as a result. Fuck that shit. It did however limit the options drastically. They provide free water everywhere though.

Despite the absolute barrage of shops, markets and street vendors, I managed to remain fairly restrained with my spending. I bought this fancy handkerchief/pocket square from the shop at the National Museum of Korea for a very reasonable 5 quid.

Suitably ethnic. And these frames for a ridiculous price of EIGHT!!! pounds. Selfie warning!

I've been wanting to get plastic frames for a while but my flat nose makes such frames impossible to wear. They end up in the position of reading glasses. As I was preparing for the holiday it occurred to me that wearing glasses is commonplace in the Far East so frames must be adjusted to fit the population properly. And my assumption proved accurate. Not only did they sell a wide range of frames with a much deeper nose bridge, a lot of them were dirt cheap. Surprising really as most other things weren't. 

So overall my first foray into solo travelling has been a great success, minor gripes like enforced silencio aside. Bodes well for the future, next up China! But not for a year

A twosome place

I'm convinced that the words 'café' and 'coffee', in English, are the most common ones adorning the million or two shop signs in Seoul. Café is all around. Despite hitherto deliberately avoiding it due to the ludicrous name, I've ventured in to one of A Twosome Place's coffee joints for a large Americano, hot. Reason being that A Twosome Place represents two of the mental imprints of this trip, and Korea itself, that will stay with me for a very long time - coffee and couples.

Cafés are EVERYWHERE, be it A Twosome Place, The Coffee Bean, Holly's Coffee, Tom n Toms Coffee, Paris Baguette, Starbucks (obviously), Doughnuts and Coffee by Dunkin' Doughnuts or all the 'international' independent places selling hot and cold versions of the black stuff. Good countries they may well be but the USP of tasting hand dripped German or Dutch coffee in Korea is somewhat lost on me. I happened past a Swedish cafe yesterday too. Thought about going in for a cup of Löfbergs but then I remembered I'll be in the real place this time next week and won't have to pay 3 quid for a shot of Karlstad's finest. Besides despite selling Dala horses on the side, there were some distinctly unauthentic sounding items on the menu, unless I've misunderstood the origins of the humble quiche. Unforgiveable. Swedish husmanskost is delicious in its own right, no need to fusion it up.

Most coffee places, and there's at least one on every street it seems, have got people in them, which would indicate that Koreans are coffee crazy. Quick scan through the list of highest coffee consumption per capita however and South Korea is way down in 26th. Sweden sits proudly at number 3 incidentally. Löfbergs Lila - feeding addictions since 1906. Going by the sheer volume of cafés and coffee vendors in Seoul I would've put Korea higher but maybe it's just confined to the cities. Or maybe people flock to cafes for things other than coffee. The fools.

This branch of A Twosome Place is certainly living up to its name. 10 tables are currently occupied of which there are twosomes of either the male-female or female-female variety on 8. Me and another bloke are sat on our own, both occupying ourselves with smart technology. The couple is omni-present in Korea, more so than in other places I've been to. Wherever you go you're surrounded by couples, it doesn't matter which setting or locality they seemingly outnumber any other formation of people. As I typed the last sentence I glanced out the window and in my eye line on a small patch of pavement were 4 couples, no other people near. Everyone should do the same check in their own locality. I bet I win. 

The culture is clearly geared up for twosomes, and most of the ones that swarm the streets, subways, shops, cafes, restaurants, museums seem very comfortable and loved up so there's probably a reason for that. Granted, there are plenty of soloists roaming around, as are groups of 3 or 4 or 5 or more men or women, but the couple stands out. Even more so as a result of the couple clothing trend. That is couples wearing his and hers version of the same t shirt, sweatshirt, shoes, you name it. Some shops have specific couples sections to cater for such fetishes. The first time I came across one it was a bonafide WTF?? moment so had to stop to investigate further. Lo and behold, a swathe of apparel designed for the amorous appeared before me. It's all a bit weird to me, and not just because I'm single. I don't know about you but I've never had a burning desire to walk down the street in matching RUN DMC t-shirts. Surely it's only fair that one of you wear De La Soul no?

For all my misgivings about the couple culture, one very endearing feature I've spotted on numerous occasions is grown men walking down the street hand in hand. Not just linking arms but holding hands. I'm fairly certain it's a term of endearment amongst friends as opposed to an indication of someone's sexual attractions, and as far as I understand it's fairly commonplace across Asian cultures. Good on them, and good for them. It makes for a jovial, friendly and relaxed atmosphere. Can't quite see that particular bromance display take off in 'developed' countries though. I'm sure most Germanic/Italic/Slavic/whatever languages have a version of "F*** off, I'm not a f******".

Discovering quirky aspects of different cultures is one of the main reasons I'm addicted to holidaying. The other day I saw an old chap delivering a large window pane by bicycle! It looked a bit awkward but the window pane appeared to be securely strapped to the side of the bike. The Korean language has different ways of saying common phrases such as hello and thank you depending on whether you're speaking to an older person, a stranger or a friend. There's also different ways of saying goodbye depending on whether you're the person staying or the person leaving. In the subway they play a fanfare over the tannoy as a train is approaching. Think similar, but better, to the one Ryanair play when they land on time (which should really be every time cos of their overly generous flight time allowance). 

Quirky also appears to be the buzzword amongst Korean architects judging by the frankly bonkers designs of the hundreds of multi-storey buildings that have sprung up across Seoul under the auspice of urban regeneration. During my week of wandering the many streets of Seoul my jaw has literally dropped on a few occasions, sometimes in admiration, sometimes in disbelief. They've clearly taken 'blue-sky thinking' to a whole new level. Unfortunately I've not always had the wherewithal to capture the splendour on camera but here are a few examples:

Mock Manhattan 

Concrete Emmenthal 

Someone's doodle mistaken for architectural plan

The Bullring goes east courtesy of Zaha Hadid



























There are aspects of Korean life and culture that I've paid attention to properly this time round and grown partial to. It's up there with Thailand as the least threatening place I've visited, or lived in. Buddhist and/or Confusion teachings are really evident. Being nice and kind to others makes a big difference. Shocker.

I love love love the food, and the position food has in everyday life. It's not some insignificant or time draining means of replenishing energy reserves, it's something to enjoy, an important part of the day, and a conduit for social interaction. The social aspect appears by all accounts integral to enjoying a fullfilled life for Koreans, be it with family or friends. All of which is great if you've got people to be social with. It comes across a very unforgiving society for people who lack in that department.

Having said that I've now left the couply cafe and moved on to a food place, a very tasty rice and kimchi bowl consumed, and there were two other people dining on their lonesome, allegedly something that's viewed with dread. Maybe attitudes and customs are a-changing. Undoubtedly dining company makes a difference for most but for me knowing I'm self sufficient is of great importance and there's no better place than here to put that to test. 

Incidentally self sufficiency has never really been an option for either country since the demarcation (learned a new word on holiday) of the Korean peninsula. The ideological influence of the 'sponsor' power is in full view in the South, I'd imagine similarly in the North. This kind of stand off makes it quite possibly the most intriguing place on earth.

During our visit in '87 we visited Panmunjom on a guided tour. It's one of the things I remember most vividly about the whole trip. We got to go in to the Joint Security Area committee room where the border cuts across the boardroom table and set foot on North Korean soil. This was of course in the latter stages of the Cold War and I remember receiving strict instructions not to make any sudden movements or else. Having already been there I opted to go off to an observation point north of Seoul to catch a glimpse of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

Here's a glimpse:

The place is called the Udosan Unification Observatory, set out over 4 floors. They had binoculars to look through and I searched desperately for some sign of life. Saw one lonesome person on a field, couple clothing may not have taken off in the North quite yet, and that was it. Utterly fascinating though, not just the realisation that you're looking at some unspectacular buildings and undulating landscapes with utmost enthusiasm, but also the opportunity to see an exhibition of North Korean stuff. Such is the representation in the west that you kind of expect caveman antics but wait, they drink, smoke, work, maintain personal hygiene, have money and send post. Incredible. It's like they're a fully functioning society. I'll be damned.

Although not actually in the DMZ, there was a souvenir shop of course. There's one at Auschwitz, just saying. I was hoping for a selection of imported DPRK goods but had to settle for some DMZ chocolates and this key ring:

3 quid well spent, guessing it's like a border police officer or something. Might save the wrapping otherwise it'll just look like an insignificant key ring, which would be a travesty. It represents unification god dammit!! The discourse at the obersatory carried positive and hopeful messages but I very much doubt I'll get to see such a twosome in my lifetime. RUN DMC said it right: it's tricky.

The land that's supposedly full of morning calm

Exhilarating and exhausting. They're the first two words that spring to mind when trying to summarise my first 4.25 days in Seoul. Bewildering and beguiling follows, as does alluring and alienating. Despite this being my third visit as a non-toddler, it's the first one in which I've been able to put things into proper context. In 1987 I was too young, everything was a big, bold adventure, and in 2002 we were too preoccupied with the World Cup, as was the rest of the country. This time, with no organised group travel or mega event to distract, and with an older but hardly wiser head on my shoulders, I've been able to take stuff in, filter it through a reasonably well travelled adult's consciousness, and travelling on my lonesome had ample time to reflect. The result is a maelstrom of impressions and emotions, not unlike the place itself.

Here's a picture to set the scene:

It's representative in two ways: coffee and couples. Both are ubiquitous.

Things didn't get off to the best of starts. In the context of my travel mishaps it doesn't quite reach top 5 but nevertheless a bloody nuisance. Flying Qatar Airways (shameless product placement in the hope of a free upgrade!) I had a connection in Doha, in the brand new, state of the art, Hamad International airport. They have iMacs dotted round for public abuse! Turns out the connecting plane had a 'technical issue' which resulted in a 4 hour plus delay. Not at all welcome when it's in the middle of the night but needs must. Upon landing at Incheon airport I couldn't use my bank cards in their cash machines and the currency exchange people only accepted hard cash, fuckers.

Blind panic and visions of having to camp out at the airport ensued. Luckily one of the machines finally accepted my card, no Tom Hanks manoeuvre needed. Upon arriving at Seoul train station the taxi driver struggled to work out the address I was going to and promptly dropped me off in the wrong place, fortunately not too far away from the intended destination. Next issue, there appears to be no building numbers marked up in Korea so finding the right place even when on the right street is a bit of a struggle. Anyway, got there in the end. Well behind schedule and a tad frazzled.

I've crammed loads in to my days already and won't bore you with the minute details, even if you ask me to. Here are some random thoughts though.

It's bloody hot. In my opinion. The locals seem to disagree though as the majority are breezingly strutting round wearing double layers and long trousers/denim. I on the other hand am wearing t shirt and shorts and still sweat like a pig. The wet look is really not all that.

Koreans are slim, even elderly people. I've not seen a single obese person, at most people have a bit of middle age spread. There's obviously something about the oriental diet - low dairy, high protein. Or maybe there are other lifestyle factors, either way it bloody works. People in general look rather healthy, despite seemingly consuming lots and lots of food, and fags and booze. I demand to know their secret.

Koreans are everywhere. The city is so, so busy at any given time, it makes you wonder if we need to reconsider their 'land of the morning calm' moniker. Hardly surprising perhaps, the metropolitan area of Seoul has a staggering population of 25 million. That's some serious headcount in a relatively limited space. Handy tip for avoiding the huge crowds: venture into a museum. I went to the suitably nationalistic National Museum of Contemporary Korean History today and it was practically empty. On that note, I would LOVE to compare and contrast with North Korea's take on contemporary history. It may well be slightly different.

Everything is clean. Public spaces like main shopping streets, subway stations, train stations, parks, even the pavements, are spotless in the main. It's initially a bit strange, particularly if you're from litter happy Britain. You quickly realise though that it's not just about employing a veritable army of cleaners, there's a palpable sense of social responsibility evident in everyday life. Puts the UK to shame.

Everything is awesome. The general mood seems buoyant and carefree, although that's probably not everyone's reality. There's a relentlessly positive and enthusiastic vibe coming through. a large part of Korean life seems to be lived outside of the home, typically over a bite to eat. Good on them.

Everything is for sale. There are shops literally everywhere, mostly health and beauty ones, and where it's not a shop it's an eatery of some description. It makes for quite a disorientating experience, every street looks similar, neon clad, crowded, noisy, food odour in the air. Consumerism is very much in full force too, people seemingly love to splash the cash. It's rare to see an empty shop be it a hardware store or a jewellers. A tad annoyingly the US presence, there's still a massive army base in central Seoul, has left a permanent mark. You can't turn a corner without bumping in to a major US brand, particularly the food outlet ones. Maybe Koreans won't stay slim for much longer.

Koreans love a good toilet. There's a toilet in every subway station and in all public spaces, which gets the thumbs up from me. When you gotta go you've just gotta go, there's nothing worse than scrambling round looking for a toilet. In Seoul that's not an issue. And of course they're all spotless.

Koreans are rather well dressed. There's a slightly uniform approach to fashion amongst young folks mind. This means that there's a certain look about both men and women with limited variation. It's easy to see why, most shops sell similar looking clothes. I had the pleasure of spending an afternoon in the Hongdae area, predominantly a student area, in the company of a local guide, Hui ji. She volunteers with Meteor Volunteer Youth Club, an organisation which offers visitors free guided tours tailored to individual preferences. It's mutually beneficial, you get a free guide, they get to practice English. If you're planning a visit I'd definitely recommend them. You can choose themes like culture, history, sights. I naturally picked shopping and Hongdae, and nearby Sinchon, are good places for clothes shopping.

If anyone's thinking to visit Seoul, or just want to find out a bit more about the city from sources other than official literature, check out the Seoulistic blog. It's excellent. And the guy who runs it featured in The Hairy Bikers' Asian Adventure so he's legit. Anyway, came across this little number in one of the shops in Hongdae:

6 or so quid in total, cheap! Strangely hardly anything else is, apart from the food. Prices have definitely gone up since we were last there. Speaking of which, the food is out of this world, IBS upsettingly spicy but oh so tasty. And I'm hooked on the little side dishes. The only slight drawback with solo travelling is in the food department. Korean BBQ restaurants are everywhere but they require at least two of you to eat. Arse! Can't have everything 'suppose. Tofu stew for one it is.

In running there is truth

Went out for the year's first run last Sunday, the first for about a month. The multiple Christmas smargasbords and other festive excesses have unsurprisingly left a fatty legacy. That ghastly McKeith woman was right about one thing: you are what you eat. Exercising better/more starts here. In my unbridled enthusiasm and optimism I opted to leave the Swedemount's at home, figuring that I'll be too hot running 21k in lycra. Big mistake, it was bloody freezing. Had I looked outside I would've possibly registered that the ground was covered with frost, as it was I was too busy scrambling around for suitable mid-run nutrition, unfortunately options were decidedly limited.

Armed with a handful of Skittles and seriously under-dressed for arctic conditions I set off. Tiswas a struggle to get round but get round I did despite crucial body parts sending me distress signals. Since I started running properly in December 2013 I've grown to think of it as a somewhat therapeutic undertaking. Whereas at first the only thing on my mind as I meandered round 6 or so miles in 60+ minutes was how much I hated running, I now see it as a welcome opportunity for pondering life's important questions. Did I turn the heating off? Can I afford a new pair of trainers? How much money can I spend on a pair of jeans if I buy a cheap pair of trainers? What shall I have for tea? If I pay a grand off my student loan every year, when will I have finished paying it off? What was the name of that god awful horror film that Shelly from Twin Peaks was in? (Stephen King's Sleepwalkers). All the important questions, totally way existential.

Somewhere between what used to be the Corner Pin but is now some random office and the Shell garage on Carlisle Street East, after I'd rejected both trainer and jean ambition but before the Twin Peaks conundrum, I decided that I really must buy that new camera I'd been mulling over and ideally straight away. Why wait anyway? Ever since I lost my keys somewhere along the route of a 21k run I always bring my bank card with me on a long run, just in case, so I adjusted my running route slightly so that it finished more or less outside Argos on Angel Street. A short moment of catching my breath followed by grappling with the new catalogue-free modus operandi and I'm sat on the tram with a new gadget and aching bones. Cue tram conductor dishing out tried and tested platitudes. “You didn't check the weather forecast this morning then?”. You're killing me honestly.

Forking out £129 and I'm now the owner of a Canon Powershot SX510HS, light weight and compact it is and all.

I've already got a previous incarnation of a Canon Powershot but like Hugh Hefner I don't really see the point in putting up with things getting old and tired when there are new models available. Plus this one has built in WiFi and a much larger zoom. Sometimes size matters. I've not had much opportunity to play around with it, the camera that is, but it takes a pretty clear screenshot of the telly and a really detailed extreme close up of the remote so it all bodes well.

Hugh Hefner aside, the main reason for buying a new camera is because I've recently booked a flight to Seoul in late April to visit South Korea in full spring blossom and I'm planning on taking a whole heap of pictures of weird and wonderful things. Aided by the Cloud and the seemingly mind blowing connectivity of South Korea I'll be able to share pictures as I go along. Everyone jumps for joy. Apart from my savings account which is now officially an endangered species.

I've been to South Korea 3 times previously. First time at birth and up til 8 months of age. Can't really remember much. Second time was in 1987 when my parents took me, my sister, brother and nan on a 2 week organised group travel along with other Swedish families who'd adopted children from South Korea in the 70s. Remember a bit more from then, got to visit loads of urban and rural sights, massive mountain set Buddha statues and such things, ate bulgogi, raw garlic and ginseng chicken, met my foster mother, stepped onto North Korean soil, bought True Blue on tape and insisted on wearing a Donald and Daisy Duck (most likely a girl's) t-shirt. Olympic fever was widespread. The third time was in 2002 for the World Cup, which was absolutely amazing, despite Sweden losing to Senegal in the last 16 to a golden goal. What a rubbish invention that was. I've still got my counterfeit Freddie Ljungberg top. One of the highlights was watching a South Korea game at Seoul's version of Times Square on the screens normally reserved for advertising, sat in the middle of a blocked off, 14 lane wide crossroads, amongst hundreds of thousands of enthusiastic, but ever so polite, Koreans.

I can't wait. I was deliberating between South Korea and Japan but ultimately chose South Korea because the flights were cheaper and the cost of things is a lot less. Frugal as I wanna be. It'll be really interesting to experience the place as a weary and cynical 37 year old as opposed to a naïvely excitable youth. A week in Seoul and a few days in the ancient capital of Gyengju, "the museum without walls", is on the intended itinerary. Plus eating lots and lots and lots of Korean food. Word: Kimchi. And I'll be damned if I get Gok-ed there. Word has it the shopping is first class and dirt cheap so I may throw caution to the wind and get both trainers and jeans. Live a little!