Taking the biscotti

To mark the arrival of British summertime (not a moment too soon), I've made biscotti. Not just any biscotti either, Bee Berrie's Chocolate orange biscotti from her inaugural recipe book. Brilliantly inventive, uber-stylishly photographed, the book is crammed full of biscuit recipes that firmly puts the fun back into baking. Mug of tea cookies, Fortune cookies, Rubik's cube cookies, Jammie dodgers, style AND substance.

I was fortunate enough to attend the book launch a few weeks back and came away with a signed copy, somewhat intoxicated on delicious Amaretti biscuittinis (recipe included in the book). I've been itching to try my hand at one of recipes since and settled on the Chocolate orange biscotti as I'd never made biscotti before and I had some oranges lying around. I ended up deviating from the original recipe ever so slightly (sorry Bee!) by swapping some of the nut varieties to what I had in the cupboard. The end result appears to have been unaffected. They're proper tasty.

The recipe was really easy to follow, with fool proof instructions and helpful tips. I shall definitely be exploring further. In fact, friends with an impending birthday can prepare themselves for cookie based presents. Perhaps some stencilled biscuits with choice wording, me, fuck, old, you're.

What I like about the book, apart from the awe-inducing photos, is that Bee seems to be declaring that quirky and cool baked creations aren't just the entitlement of the gentrified bourgeoisie with money to burn. We can all be artisans. With icing, stencils and cookie cutters in our armoury and taste combination tutelage from Bee herself, the biscuit revolution starts here. Vive la patisserie!

To get your hands on a copy of Bee's Brilliant Biscuits from a retailer that pays their fair share into the British state purse, visit your local bookshop (unless it's closed down because the tax avoiding antics of corporate behemoths have forced their hand) or go online, Foyles for example.

Not on my watch

I've got myself a new toy in the shape of a Sony Smartwatch 3, my first foray into the weird and wonderful world of 'wearables'. Having something cleverer than yourself on your wrist does have its benefits. For instance you can change the fascia like 20 times a day. How I managed to live life without one is beyond me.

Good innit? The main reason for investing in yet another electricity draining gadget was to replace the slightly uncomfortable mobile arm strap when out running with something eminently more portable, however here's where it's somewhat less brainy. 

I use the Nike+ app for tracking my runs and keeping me informed of pace and distance. This particular app isn't available on Android Wear, presumably because Nike are bed fellows with Apple. Sort it out Google. The OS isn't the most intuitive and accessing app menus can feel a bit clunky. Worst of all though, you can't play Spotify through the watch. Doh! I stopped (il)legally purchase music years ago so having to load the watch with MP3s feels regressive and far from clever. At least I can change the fascia 40 times a day though so all is not lost.

I bought the watch as an impulse whilst in Sweden. My parents were buying a laptop and I stumbled upon the watch in the electronics shop. It was 15 quid CHEAPER than the UK. Result. It had its first outing a misty morning in Åmål (of Fucking Åmål fame), 5.47 km of cross country skiing, completed in 35 mins and 52 seconds. Gunde Svan I am not. But I can change the fascia 60 times a day. Life is good

No, no, no, no, YES!

In my mind there's no such thing as a strict negative when it comes to spending money. Last minute jitters, sweaty palms at the thought of parting with loadsa cash, the prospect of eating beans and value bread for a month. Sure but no, no, no, it's all good. Strict financial management, denying oneself the delights of new purchases. Yes, yes, yes, total misery.

Over the last couple of weeks I've acquired a mini capsule collection of discounted goods. Shocking behaviour, and so unlike me. 70% or more off equals a virtual giveaway and I never say no to a freebie. No, no, no, yes.

Grey cable knit jumper, Topman - 67% off

Black roll neck long sleeved top, River Island - 75% off

Black skinny cropped trousers, River Island - 60% off

Brown suede brogue wedge shoes, Office - 60% off

White short sleeved shirt in a 2 pack, Topman - 60% off

Blue quilted sweatshirt, Topman - 83% off

According to the style experts throwing their tuppenceworth into this year's Oscar frock glamaganza, blue in all its hues is bang on trend for spring summer 2016 so chances are I'll be parading the sweatshirt at any given opportunity. Wearing it as we speak even. Previous incarnations of the black roll neck and black trouser combo have drawn comparisons with the Milk Tray man by my work colleagues. The similarities clearly end there, I ain't risking my life to deliver a box of chocolates to nobody. Yes, yes, yes, fuck that. 

There are lots of things I would say yes to though, no, no, no qualms about it. Arsenal miraculously going the rest of the season unbeaten. Zlatan in blue and yellow slaying the competition in France this summer. The sunniest, driest Great British summer since records began. A Dale Winton sponsored supermarket sweep in Selfridges. An overwhelmingly resounding trouncing of the Brexit brigade in June. A humiliating defeat for Donald Trump in November (Hillary FTW!) 

For all its fallacies, I unequivocally feel that the UK is better in than out of the EU, particularly as we're currently at the mercy of a government who sees the Human Rights Act as unwelcome bureaucracy. Anyone believing that 'reclaiming British sovereignty' will automatically mean a better deal for the general population need to stop overdosing on Murdoch supplied news. And wouldn't it be great to witness Boris Johnson's face when an IN verdict is read out?? Priceless. As for Trump, such a vile clown holding the most powerful position in the world doesn't bear thinking about. He makes Kim Jong Un appear rational and sensible.

This year, two of the most significant ballots ever will be made within months of each other. People of the world, the decision is yours. Don't fuck it up. Yes, yes, yes, no.